I ran across a story in the newspaper that humorously illustrates how family stories can adapt and change. The story isn’t humorous per se; it’s a rather morbid tale about a pet parrot killing chickens in a coop. However, a later retelling made me laugh outright. The bones of the original story were there, but the details so embellished it was almost comical.m
The first story appeared on 7 June 1892 in The Buffalo Morning Express (New York) regarding a parrot owned by a man named Henry Stimper who lived in Brooklyn.1
The Parrot Got Even
A parrot with a long tail and an exceedingly bad eye, belonging to Henry Stimper, a saloon-keeper of 110 Bedford Avenue, Williamsburg, killed 17 chickens belonging to its master on Sunday. It wouldn’t talk when he wanted it to, and he contemptuously tossed it into a coop where he had some valuable chickens.
Half an hour later, when the saloon keeper went to the chicken-coop for the parrot, he found the bird attacking one of the chickens. Sixteen others were dead on the floor of the coop.
Compare this to the story found in the Milford Times (Michigan) on 24 June 1893:2
“I’ll Get Square”
The Story of a Parrot With a Red Tail and Bad Eye
Henry Stimper, a Brooklyn grocer, owns a parrot that has a red tail and bad eye. The bird talks and talks fluently. He can converse in low Dutch and swear in several languages. But sometimes he strikes a spell of reticence, and then dynamite can not blow words out of his beak. He had taken such a fit when Stimper’s brother George came from New York. Stimper wanted the bird to say “uncle” to his brother, but the bird declined to admit the relationship. He simply cocked his bad eye at the New Yorker and maintained a chilly silence. Finally Stimper got mad and shouted: “I’ll fix you if you don’t say ‘uncle.’”
“I’ll get square,” croaked the parrot in return.
“You will, will you?” replied the now thoroughly-aroused grocer, “well, we’ll see about that.”
Throwing a cloth over the bird, that snapped at him viciously, Stimper took it into the back yard. The grocer is a bit of a chicken fancier, and has a couple of big coops which contain twenty-six choice fowls, a couple of game roosters being among the number.
“In you go,” said Stimper, as he threw the parrot among the fowls, “and I hope you’ll get a good hiding.”
Stimper turned away with a contemptuous smile. He forgot all about the bird until the next night. Then he thought he would visit the humiliated Polly. He found sixteen of his fowls stone dead, with their brains pecked out. On the highest perch in sight was what remained of the surviving rooster. By his side were the few chickens left.
“I’ll get square,” chuckled the parrot, as it wiped its bloody beak on the corpse of its last victim.
The second story is much more entertaining: the parrot’s relationship with Henry Stimper is more defined, it’s personality more colorful, and details have been amplified for entertainment value. I can only imagine that this is how family stories become larger than life.
Footnotes
1 The Buffalo Morning Express (New York), “The Parrot Got Even”, 7 June 1892, online database Old Fulton NY Post Cards (https://fultonhistory.com : accessed 26 August 2022).
2 The Milford Times (Michigan), “I’ll Get Square”, 24 June 1893, p 5. col. c, online database Digital Michigan Newspapers (https://digmichnews.cmich.edu : accessed 26 August 2022).
Parrot image in header: Photo by Magda Ehlers from Pexels
